is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"
... there are chew marks on my license. I have no idea.
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
Would it be weird if I told you I thought of you when I masturbated?
Looks like I'm more than just your Mexico mistake...
I just had a contest with the toilet to see who could hold their breath longest.
I won
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
Homeboy just asked me to strip for him. He should not be this horny and allowed to be in Vegas with his kid.
Do you think it would be okay if i cleaned my cartilage piercing with the leftover vodka?
No way man ... This is real life. Complete sentences and everything.
I think my stomach is breaking up with me. It's giving me back everything I ever gave it.
Randomize
