I think I just was a dick to Paul Rudd.
I wish I could tape me & him having sex. Not for pornographic reasons, just for comic relief.
We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
I wish there was a non-hangover washing machine that I could stick myself in right now
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
You bought champagne and told everyone it was because I'd just found out I was pregnant. How exactly is that being a good wingman?
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
True friends don't judge, they just try to have more booty calls than you do.
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
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I can't. Currently naked covered in Nair trying desperately to catch his cat that rubbed up on my leg.
I hate that cat.
You're not talking any sense into me. You're cheering me on to disaster.
... is that not half the reason I'm your best friend in the first place?
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