I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
I wish sober me loved running as much as drunk me...
Just did a walk of shame dressed as a cowgirl and walked past his ex's entire sorority. Yippee kye aye, motherfucker.
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
I swear to god little potato creatures live inside Belvedere bottles and claw at your throat as you swallow shots.
mom had to come pick me up from the hotel. I crawled to her car. She told me the entire way home if I puked in it I was going to lick it up. Like high school all over again...
Can you repeat that, but with context?
Randomize
