can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
he shaved USA in his pubs
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
I just found out I was conceived in a rehab facility... that's better than finding out your dad could be someone else right?
I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
Can you imagine how doomed are children are? I mean for one they have our genetics and then we will ruin them as parents. It will be the most magical adventure. Let's not start soon, too many adventures at hand that involve immense amounts of alcohol.
im actually so stoned and hungover i feel like a bag of jello stuffed into a human shape
all I'm saying is that my epic blow jobs have made grown professional football players cry in ecstasy
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
That awkward moment when you bring a guy back to your place then have to tell him you only have magnums.
Randomize