Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
My mom just told me that the key to a successful marriage is never seeing your partner take a shit.
He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
2 bagels in my tummy and my herpes on my mind
I don't give a shit about soccer but I'm really excited about drinking at 7 in the morning
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
She's got a butler. A fucking butler. Shes like batman, but with a better ass.
Apparently you missed the drunkest me ever documented. I slept on the hardwood floor and left my pants on the porch to give u a frame of reference.
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
Happy birthday and sorry I punched your friend in the face
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
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