It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
She didn't know my name but she knew I was Canadian so she just called me Canada. It sounded like the national anthem when we were fucking.
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
He talked to you for like two seconds while you were shit faced doing Forest Gump impressions...how is that possible?
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
I need a new pic for your contact id. Because your boobs popping up when I'm having dinner with my grandma or, ya know, when kids have my phone isn't so good.
So your contact has been changed to "jizz weave" in my phone. Now, as strange and random as that may be, I'm slightly embarrassed to say that I have more than one contact that fits that description so please identify yourself.
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
And no one can masturbate with the sound of Bernie's voice in the background
I just texted my mom from a strip club.
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
Randomize
