Whoa!!! Accidentally took a dump in chick's bathroom at Red Robin. 1 hr for coast to be clear. Women's farts sound like geese taking last breath. Liars.
Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
Are you dead or are you taking another 13 hour nap? you need to let me know these things ahead of time so i dont worry.
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
He SHOWED UP to the party wearing one shoe and a dinosaur hat. He kept lifting up his shirt and asking people to bite his nipple.
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
Randomize
