they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
Moan for me like Helen Keller
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
Do you think i can prewrite an apology on friday and leave it vague enough to just finish on sunday?
Turns out he's old enough to be my dad. I'm so excited. I've never had a sugar daddy before. What should I ask for first!? Want anything?
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
I'm going through what feels like a break up with beer. I'm emotionally distraught from it's lack of presence.
Stop leaving buckets of wine at my house.
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
Her cop pants made me imagine I was riding a unicorn and by unicorn I mean her face
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
Randomize
