How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
Just got a blowjob to the theme of Bohemian Rhapsody as the sun was rising. I should just kill myself because ill never top this moment.
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
Hurricane Earl: Get Blown party at my house friday! Byob: bring your own bitch/booze. Must have 80s blown hair style, kazoo/noise maker (vuvuzelas/airhorns are allowed), and/or bubble wands. \n
Why am I even shocked you're doing this....
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
If sitting in the car passing a flask back and forth because the bar we go to is having some power issues on Christmas eve isn't Christmas spirit, then I don't know is.
I'm at a bar. It's body paint Wednesday. All of the waitresses are topless. Help me
The Winnie the Pooh costume was great until you got drunk and started yelling at the kids asking for pictures.
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
When i like your selfie it means one of two things. 1. thats a nice photo, friend. OR 2. I wanna bend you over a table. But youll never know.
we received free cupcakes at the first bar, and then I at the second bar i hooked up with a fat chick from Cincinnati on the patio.
you win some, you lose some.
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
Not sure she's stomping around my apartment muttering incoherently about wanting to speak to the colonel
Randomize
