So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
I just realized i masturbated to the home shopping network. I either need to get a boyfriend asap, or a subscription to a porn website, or i just need to stop taking ambien
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
I have more bruises, scratches, and overall soreness from my birthday weekend than my car accident.
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
If you hear a sad honk in the wind it is me.
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
THANKS BE TO BLACK BABY JESUS IN HIS LITTLE GOLDEN DIAPER FOR BLESSING ME WITH NOT PREGNANT
Sorry I steam cleaned at 1:30 in the morning and that i'm such a drunk dumb child. On the bright side, my carpet has ever looked better.
Randomize
