Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
So the coke mirror was perfectly angeled at my face right when i woke up this morning. I now know how I'd look on intervention.
I came over to his house for a party and realized I was quoted on the fridge... "How'd I get rug burn on my face?" And yes, my name was right next to it!
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
we just ate hash browns in a nativity scene with baby jesus
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
I accused him of not drinking enough alcohol and eating tacos after midnight. I was sober and he's not a gremlin. I would say bad.
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
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