You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
We walked through the hotel lobby in slow-mo taking huge steps because we were astronauts, and astronauts obviously can't be drunk.
stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
He waited til after we had sex to tell me he had herpes... Ugh I hate being drunk
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
I THREW AWAY MY VIBRATOR BECAUSE IT INTIMIDATED HIM. WORST. DECISION. EVER
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
She started telling me about this odd patch of smooth skin under her boobs. Not sure if she was hitting on me or looking for free advise from a doctor...
I mean, I still played with her tits for like 20min tho.
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
Randomize
