I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
The first sip always goes straight to my vagina.
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
I'm drinking wine alone, eating leftovers, and cleaning my sex toys. For the love of god, do not graduate.
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
Apparently when it was last call I jumped up on the bar and told everyone to get the fuck out, which was immediately followed by a round of applause from the bouncers/bartenders and my tab getting paid as well.
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
I knew it was going to be a good night when my mom said "Have fun, be safe...wait, do you need any weed for tonight?"
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
I have post one night stand depression
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
Randomize
