There are traffic cones in the living room. One of them is yours.
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
I was going through my paperwork and I found the lifetime warranty card for my 14" dildo. I saved it. You know, just in case.
The cops just showed up and arrested her. It's our 2nd date. Do I have to hang out her with her 3 kids until she makes bail or can I leave?
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
We need a bunch of roses, some chocolate, 2 cops, a mariachi band, and a thermometer
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
I need to stop getting high and watching documentaries. Wanna go to Japan with me and protest the mass genocide of dolphins?
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
Randomize
