I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
I woke up this morning in your mom's car... any ideas?
I just saw a homeless man dressed as a pirate. I love san francisco.
Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
can you pick up eggs and chocolate sauce on your way home?
what kind of party is this?
the best kind ever
There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich.
the arrest was probably divine intervention, cause i think we were heading to an ill-advised threesome.
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
New carpet is nice. I'm making carpet angels. Like a fresh snowfall.
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
I'm washing down the sadness with shots of vodka.
is it fun? or sober?
Randomize
