I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
Barsexuality is the new black.
I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
this morning i woke up under the kitchen table. i went to my room and there was an inflatable whale in my bed with a banana duct taped to where its penis should be. there were trails of cheez-its around my apartment and i found $67 in the crotch of my underwear. im guessing i had a very happy birthday.
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
I'm just glad you're the only person I can have a "remember when we thought I was pregnant" conversation with.
You know i'm the father figure
Yeah the father who ate her out with me last night. Great dad
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
Naw dude theres seriously a lobster in my sock drawer. Why?
Randomize