uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
You do realize I got a panda tattooed on my ass just to get you laid, right?
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
I FEEL LIKE I CAN TAKE DOWN A FULLY GROWN MOUNTAIN LION WITH ONLY A POINTY STICK OH MY GOD
Nope. Flying out tonight. Staying with my great aunt who is an ex nun turned hostel owner. Best and likely most dangerous St. Patty's Day to commence in 10 hours. IRELAND!
Be safe. And I hate you.
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
Note to self; if you can light it on fire, you probs shouldn't drink it
Fun fact: deep throating plus dehydration plus eating a lot of citrus = my throat is fucked. Metaphorically and physically.
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
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