I just spent my lunch hour driving around campus yelling "TRADE LIVES WITH ME!" to all the freshmen moving in
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
I threw up red last night... I wanted to pinch myself because it wasn't green.
i cant belive i got a ticket! i know what his dick tastes like!
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
Would you like season tickets to my vagina?
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
I just delete my bank app from my phone to have enough storage to download tindr. Is this my life now?
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
The beauty of getting kicked out of college again is I can fuck my professor's brains out and she can't get fired now
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
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