i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
I always have to poop after I paint my nails. It never fails.
Just ducktaped my beer to my bike. See you in ten.
it's 8 a.m. and there are people having sex at the foot of the strangers bed i'm in. the guy just asked the girl how she lost her baby weight so fast.
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
Please don't let me drink ever again. I apparently told him he could stay but as there was no room in the bed he'd have to lie on top of me and he'd need to anchor himself on with his penis so he didn't fall off.
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
I'm about to order this penis-casting kit so text me within 5 mins if you're not down
I'm not in the business of asking people about their lizard
I meant his actual lizard not his manhood
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
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