i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
Just had to explain to a senior manager why I had duct tape residue on my wrist and hand. This weekend was a success.
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
i'm about to rub a glazed donut on my face just so it feels like you're here
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
He's like a hurricane
a drunk, sexist, hurricane
I'm 2 seconds away from smashing the bottle and drinking it off the counter with a straw.
I ask for a dick pic and he sends a picture of Dick Cheney. Who does that?
Things that have happened since you moved: Lemmy, Bowie, Snape, Prince, civility, democracy, Carrie Fisher, all dead. Record flooding down here. Twice. This is clearly your fault.
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
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