New invention idea: vibrating tampons
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
This girl told me I had the balls of an infant..I replied by saying her vagina looks like Stargate.
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
Legitimate logistical question....how did you pee in your duct tape dress?
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
Question for you. Do you want to go out somewhere or do you want to have sloppy joes at my house? That's not a euphemism for anything; I actually have stuff to make sloppy joes
You're officially the most high maintenance man I've ever had inside me.
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
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