we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
you were fixing your hair in the bathroom mirror and then fell backwards through the locked stall while she was in mid pee and fell on her lap.
God gave him joint rollers for hands
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
the only way to explain how i feel is someone rolled me down a big fucking hill and then a dog came a took a huge ruthless shit in my mouth at the bottom
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
I dunno what the deal was, but you spent about an hour trying to put your phone charger in the outlet and you were yelling "one plug to rule them all"
So what are you going to be for halloween?
A woman sitting on her couch watching Hocus Pocus.
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
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