How does everyone that never saw me naked know I'm built like a smurf?
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
Reason 37 booty call break ups suck: I literally could not find his house in the daytime.
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
I just want to dump glitter on my floor and roll in it like a cat in catnip.
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
How does it feel to date your dad?
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
Randomize
