im just gonna turn drinking alone on new years into a tradition
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
I don't remember which guy I met at the bar is coming to pick me up. It will be like my birthday surprise.
you woke me up in the middle of the night to tell me you were taking off your pants and it was not an invitation.
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
dude chill. we stole 18 hamburgers from her house
no. you cant fuck a burger.
He's a little cute, in a dorky, I-know-for-a-fact-his-cock-is-huge kind of way
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
Monday is now my bitch. I just did 20 naked push ups on the bar for $20
Drinking Patron always ends with me puking or receiving anal. So make your move when I start ordering it.
We inadvertently arrived at the strip club on Bear Night. The dancers all look like young Santa Claus and there's a buffet....
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
Randomize
