I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
And if it was a miscarriage you should figure out whose it was. He must be an alphamale for his offspring to sustain life this long in the amusement park that is your body
Gave him an awesome blow job on his living room couch last night, so at least he'll have something nice to think about next time he's watching the Tigers lose.
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
For the sake of being nice I congratulated her and she replied with something along the lines of that I need to stay away from him and not touch him ever. I really wanted to be like "been there, done that" but my New Years resolution was to not start any cat fight over boys with small dicks before noon
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
She said "we just have chemistry" ... I wanted to say "no, you just have a vagina."
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
I was trying to decide if i was still high whenever i realized i was pressing the buttons on the microwave cause i liked the sound.
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
Randomize
