She kept saying "I didn't do it" but she was so drunk she forgot her pee was orange from her UTI medicine.
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
I just found out my college boyfriend's nickname is actually a Dutch word for little cucumber.....it all makes sense now.
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
Too bad I can't un-pee in his body wash
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
Sorry for peeing on you and your bed last night.
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
Randomize