We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
I shaved my pubes to make my cock look like it has a lions mane. to surprise the girl that works at the zoo when she comes over.
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
I twisted my ankle while drunkenly playing in my adult kickball league. Now I'm having to use my grandpa's cane to walk at this party. I am so single.
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
She keeps comparing me to her favorite dildo and I don’t know if I’m flattered or creeped out
I thought this boy told me to choke him, so I went all in. Turns out he really said “stroke.”
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
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