It wouldn't matter if you are Jesus Christ himself, you are not getting into the bar tonight
my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
Don't be alarmed at the kitchen mess. I had to shoot the fire extinguisher on the toaster oven, one quick blast. It was a matter of safe over sorry.
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
for the record, you never really realize how drunk you still are until you get on rollerskates...
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
you gave me money for the cab and then walked home..
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
Randomize
