I seem to have left my pride at pride
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
whoever threw up in my shampooo bottle is totally getting defriended on facebook.
i tried to stop you. you just kept saying your split ends needed punishment.
Who ate shrimp cocktail in my bathroom last night?
Steaks?
It's Ash Wednesday.
If you really think that not eating meat on a weeknight is going to keep you out of hell, fine. Can I use that chimichurri you made?
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
If he doesn't fuck you on the 4th of July, he doesn't really love this country.
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
Florida is balancing how much this place sucks with how many vodkas you can have to cope in order to still be allowed on the plane to leave
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
Taking one of the loudest shits ever at work and I have to say...I'm having a better time than I thought I would
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
