it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
He says he's "masters drunk." And if that's anything like "kentucky derby drunk" I know enough to not go over there.
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
Drinking with a woman who gave an anti-drugs speech at my high school. Somehow, not surprised.
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
She just admitted to me that she was a pinecone.
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
The Medal of Honor you banged could be at the inauguration today. You really dropped the ball on keeping up with that one.
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
It wasn't a mystery that it was the pizza cooking in the oven when we stumbled out of the bedroom in a smoke filled apartment at 2am. We are dangerous drunks
Im wearing a bra. Made of paint.
Stocking up on Wasabi powder. Nobody's tampons are safe.
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
Randomize
