How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
Idk man, it felt like my skin was a suit and I could feel it zipping up my side and up to my mouth. And then my head felt like a ventriloquist dummy's head, with the jaw thing..it was freaky, dude
You think that's a metaphor for anything, champ?
Shut the hell up.
Say "Steve Buscemi is hot." with a straight face.
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
Holy walk of shame. Fuck someone's house. I walked past a family eating their free continental breakfast wearing yesterday's makeup
not a day goes by that I don't wish you were here or I there. Today it was because I had the desire to get high and go look at the jellyfish at the aquarium and you're the perfect buddy for that.
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
Why was I drunk tweeting incorrect Beyonce lyrics last night?
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
Randomize
