I left the party when things started to get crazy... and when I say crazy I mean: there was puke on the carpet, Evan was passed out behind a plant, Mary was making out with her ex while her present bf was making out with Nancy. Not to mention that someone fisted the wall. Also - someone is sleeping on your lawn - they might be dead, I didn't check. Later.
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
all we need is a shotglass and a helicopter.
Let's play a little game called "Chill the Fuck Out" - you're our first contestant
Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
Hatred of squirrels is the least of my hereditary problems.
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
While buying Plan B the lady at the counter looked at me and said hope you have a successful night as I walked away in shame
How much glitter would I have to ingest in order for a "magnificent" amount to appear in my ejaculate?
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
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