Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
I guess I really am the only person in this world who can successfully have a no-strings-attached threesome on the beach.
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth.
You insisted we help some homeless guy put up posters for his missing pet alligator so we left you there because they were really just Chinese takeout menus.
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
Hey, thanks for not calling the cops when I answered the door naked, high as fuck, and covered in red velvet cake batter.
He literally just laid flat on top of me motionless at one point. It felt less like foreplay and more like he was trying to use me as a flotation device. 0/10
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
Fuck this pandemic. She grabbed the hand sanitizer instead of the hand lotion while giving me a hand job and now my dick is burning and scrotum are on fire
A hand job? Are you 12?
Randomize
