There's some strange man with hair that keeps talking to us. I'm scared.
This is how horror movies start. Going to bar with strange hair guy. He's paying. Bad idea?
Ditched hair man. Got free cab ride to market. Want food. I win.
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like having to pee in a condom for my cousin so that he can pass a drug test.
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
The vodka gummy bears are so strong. If I die of alcohol poisoning, please tell my dad it was single malt scotch.
welp, we watched the human centipede high last night and my mind literally shut down, when i came to all i could hear was mel saying EAT EAT HIS SHIT
There's wax on my nightstand, my sheets look like Christmas, and my vagina feels like it got into a fight. All signs of a good night
I teamed up with my vagina. I compromised his morals and then she corrupted him for good. It’s been a very successful and slutty partnership
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