you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
My "High Times" magazine came in today, as well as my girlfriend's new sex toys. We're calling in sick today.
So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
I just saw the nastiest chick.
Where?
woke up next to her... fuck you jack daniels, fuck you
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
I just found a babydoll head in my sink where we ripped it off and did shots out of it.
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
you puked on the porch, i can see your jacket on the floor next to your underwear. i know your home, unchain the door, you're the worst roommate ever.
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
I was so high I kept trying to flush the toilet with the light switch
Randomize
