Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
you have to be so drunk to ignore a taser
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
I'm also 95% sure I had a conversation with someone on how hard it would be to jerk off with out opposable thumbs
What the fuck am I going to do with a pinata full of tampons?
I just had a brazillian performed by a hungarian named olga. Im pretty sure she was trying to rip out my soul. You owe me a million orgasms
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
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