Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
I walked into his room and he was naked with a half eaten pecan pie and a bottle of wine.
All I've consumed over the last couple days is Vanilla Coke, semen, and Coors. I don't think today will be any different.
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
I swear my vagina formed calluses just to deal with how big he is
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
Also, I just opened Google to find the lyrics to California Gurls. Karaoke night did us dirty.
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
Change the sheets & put your dick in the dishwasher. I'll see you in an hour.
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
Randomize
