I just egged your windshield and it froze on contact. Have fun with that.
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
She rolled over this morning and asked "did you refer to my vagina as splash mountain last night? "
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
Before I left he asked me if I could submit my panties for the frat house undergarment chandelier. I said yes
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
Randomize
