I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
OMFG I JUST SAW SOMEONE GIVING SOMEONE ELSE ROAD HEAD AND THEY HIT A POTHOLE. my day has been officially made.
I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
we were all standing in the kitchen taking shots and we look over at you and your face is in the plate of spaghetti you were eating.
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
You puked on my feet last night. You owe me a pedicure.
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
Randomize