Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
I told my mom happy mother's day then rubbed my belly and said "Oh, and happy grandmother's day too..." She started sobbing. You were right, that wasn't the best way to tell her.
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
I fucked her wearing an American flag. Now here I am, awake, naked, and flag less. How do I report this to the police?
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
Everytime I try to keep track of the amount of people I slept with I always forget about that guy I met on the dc metro, where I woke up to him organizing his Special K and Molly and I was covered in sleeping cats.
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
I got all the way to work before I realized there were Trojans in my bra.
Randomize
