He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
It's alarming how good I'm getting at being productive at work on Thursday after Johnny Walker Wednesdays.
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
Whenever you get off. By "pick me up from work" I mean, "pick me up from a bar by work at your earliest convenience" :)
So, last night I fell asleep sitting Indian-style on the floor, propped up against the front of the couch with an empty wine bottle in between my legs... How was your night?
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
Hey
Gfdhklhgfxzyuikl$
GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
She’s super into those renaissance faires. But, if you can’t actually stab anyone, what’s the point?
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
Is there a number of dicks a girl can have in a weekend before it becomes unacceptable? Asking for a friend
Remember! It’sa long weekend and a holiday weekend and it’s America’s birthday! So don’t short change me!
I thought you were asking for a friend
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
I have a number of responses, ranging in content, tone, and maturity. Choose your destiny...
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