I walked in on him cutting a hole in the condom.
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
Because i love you. And people show love by not letting their friends shit themselves.
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
I planned out my poor life choices for the weekend.
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
How do you explain to your parents that you can't go to the library because you got banned for being drunk in there... on a Sunday afternoon?
That's $100,000 of quality education right there.
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
Randomize