We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
I'm driving in the middle of nowhere, and I just saw a stuffed Barney hanging from a noose on a tree. Maybe I should turn around.
Our hot neighbor just came over and asked for a toilet plunger...not so hot anymore
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
Just did a kegstand with my dad. Happy fathers day.
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
We christened the whole apartment and fucked on the balcony. It was amazing. I'm 100% sure downtown heard me climax. Now we can unpack.
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
I guess you know it was a good night when you find your ripped underwear in your pocket, and a nerf bullet falls out of your pant leg 😂😂
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