Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
It's one of those days where you order the free Papa John's pizza so the delivery guy can bring you Coke to go with your rum. The tip was more than the order.
my hip hurts so fuckin bad. and I just found a half eaten burrito in my nightstand drawer.
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
I used the light from the first guy's text notification to be able to snapchat the second guy in the dark. I am too good at juggling guys.
Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
Hey, if a dude can't randomly belt out Whitney Houston tunes from time to time, is life really worth living??
drinking vodka out of a wine glass to feel a little bit classier about myself.
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
Randomize