Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
if my vagina gave out awards, he should be preparing acceptance speaches for the oscar, the heisman and the nobel peace prize.
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
Thought it only fitting this Jubilee weekend to snort lines with a 50 note
Your patriotism amazes me, the Queen would be proud!
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
Get over your kidney infection all ready. You have been sober for too long.
I know you do it only because of my toyota, but thank you for fucking me. Seriously.
Randomize
