I'm really into asian looking animals
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
He just brought me a wine glass. Full of Tequila. Ignore any texts after this one.
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"
I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep
you want your laptop back?
are you giving me my laptop back, or cashing in on our break up sex?
both.
come over.
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
Please ignore everything I told you about my girlfriends vagina last night.
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
If my plane goes down do me a favor. Break into my house and get the batman costume and swing out of my bedroom.
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
She couldn't find her toothbrush so I had to wait while she sucked on the 12 peppermints she found under the couch. Pretty resourceful for her level of intoxication.
Randomize
