Do you need to be saved?
No I think I'm God
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
Idk, you were a drunk pirate that kept stealing pieces of people's costumes to keep as your booty.
That would explain all the random shit in my room...
She just broke into my apartment while I was asleep, woke me up and drunkenly tried to seduce me for about 2 minutes, then passed out..
Doing bumps while the kids play upstairs. #bestnannyever
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
I put on a tiger onsie to initiate sex... It worked
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
I didn't have any lime for my chaser.. so after my shot I ate a handful of lime flavored chips. Didn't work so great.
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
Randomize
