I'm drinking in the hospital parking lot.
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
I just had an epiphany. There is NOTHING TO STOP ME from making cake mix and eating it all instead of making a cake. It feels like my entire life has peaked at this moment.
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
you were wandering around the street for like an hour singing "nothing but socks on"..an original you wrote after the 12th shot i believe
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
Getting drunk at 9 am is not a super power.
I was the oldest, shortest, and soberest at the New Years party last night. My life sucks
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
I totally fucked your pastor last night.
You're his wife.
Still a dirty get down.
Randomize
