Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
when I woke up I found a half-eaten cherry toaster strudel sandwich with bacon in the middle.
At the T-Rex bar with my nephew...only in Disney can I have a beer and a soda at the bar with a 4 year old
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
I just did something so unspeakable in the panera bathroom that their health score dropped 10 points.
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
Do you think blood ever gets sick of carrying all these drugs around?
Like, there are so many different things we make it do, and it just wants to settle down and be a one-drug fluid?
Stop reading WebMD high.
So on a scale from 1-10 how gross is it that I used mortuary makeup on my own face?
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
I'd love you more if you were covered in hot cheetos
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
Randomize
