i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
I'm wayyy too drunk to be in a parade right now
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
LSD in a sugar cube. Dropped it in my whiskey sour and felt like I was rowing a boat.
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
The last time I saw you, you were rolling around on the ground at the bar.....
.....well it was bound to be an interesting night since I was chasing my pulls with pulls....
SHE SITS THERE LIKE A DICK LIKE AN ACTUAL DICK JUST LIMP AND DUMB AND BLAH
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
I asked him why the bed was wet and got.."well there are two options... and its not you."
I found you laying in a field of grass near the trail I jog on in the morning like a drunken Bambi.
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
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