I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
that's why i date skinny girls, they don't realize how small it is.
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
I tapped out to boredom. She bought me a full meal at Subway. Two tap beers and a pretty weak long island iced tea. I'm five dollars cheaper to fuck than she is.
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
Next person that gets my dog drunk is paying to have my carpet cleaned. I am tired of getting up to pee and stepping in dog barf.
So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep.
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
Oh dude I know. When something that's supposed stop pregnancies taste like chocolate something's up
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it
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